You Tell Me
I think my coworker likes me. Not just friendly like, but like like.
It's kind of weird. I mean, I'm friendly with him and enjoy hanging out, but today I got a different vibe.
Picture this - Sicily, April 1924.
Today he came into work still drunk (apparently). He asked what I was doing for lunch and I said I wasn't sure and was probably just getting something to drink at 7-11 and then coming back to work. He asked if I wanted to go to the park like we did yesterday. Although yesterday another coworker was with us. I said "Sure, meet me out front at my car." We stopped at 7-11, we went to this Italian place to pick up his sandwich and then we went to the park.
There are benches all around and we just sat on two that were open. Not a big deal. Well, here's the kicker- He went to throw away his trash and then when he came back he sat right next to me. Like in my personal space next to me. HA!!HA!! That was kind of weird, but I didn't want to act like it was weird so I just stayed calm. Eventually we left and came back to work.
Now, we've been out a couple times. I went to happy hour with him and another coworker a LONG time ago. We also met for some coworker's departure happy hour/birthday party, and we hated the coworker and were just going to talk about everyone. For some reason the coworkers we liked couldn't go, but we did have fun. Then, we hung out at the bar for the MD basketball game. His roommate was there and that was a fun time. We ended up meeting up with some of their other friends and then I felt like a mom, so I had to go. They are all in their 20s. We also hung out on St. Patty's day with a lot of other coworkers, and now I might be going to a soccer game with him and his roommate on Saturday.
He invites me places all the time and I don't think of them as "dates" but maybe I should. I don't think this is good. He knows I have a boyfriend, but I think he just likes hanging out with me. That's okay, right? I would NEVER EVER IN A MILLION YEARS do anything with this guy. What say you peanuts?
posted by peachy @ 2:50 PM
9 Comments:
Ah Peachy, I've told you a few times before that he likes you. More than 'just friends' likes you. He's been pretty obvious about it before this incident.
Don't know what to tell you about how to handle it though. Maybe you shouldn't say anything unless you have to.
Heartbreaker!
I say ask him. What could it really hurt? In my life honesty has always worked best. Try this:
Hey, Bob(hehehe), you know I really enjoy hanging out with you right? Lately I've been feeling a weirdness between us. Have you noticed that?
If he says No: Act like you ate some hallucinogenic cheese or something.
If he says Yes: Then work you way up to asking him if he likes you in that way. Then you'll know for sure and can make your next move.
as long as he doesn't make you uncomfortable, what's the harm in hanging out? if he crosses a certain line, then you reserve the right to kick his ass...or at least set him straight.
I say: Don't ask him and make him feel uncomfortable. If you like hanging out with him, and he likes hanging out with you, then why should it be weird? Whenever I ask my guy friends if they like me, whatever the answer is, it changes the relationship in a negative way. Just go with the flow.
If you keep getting that vibe from him, casually mention Ed . an example
" Oh we will have to come here again, I bet my BF would enjoy it also" or See if Ed can come to the game too.( even if you don't ask Ed, this will let the co worker know that you have a BF, or remind him.) This way it will Give the co worker the chance to either let you know how he feels, or he will maybe change the vibe he sends off, know what i mean?
( its Emmie btw, i forgot my password ,so i couldn't log in under my name..lol )
Good advice everyone.
YB-HA!!HA!! You were just supposed to read, not comment. hee hee.
Nina-It's not Bob. :) I do like the hallucinogenic cheese idea.
LE-I think I like your idea the best. It's just fun to hang out. No pressure at all.
Ropemonkey-SHHH!!!
Quyen- If you ask, things will be worse because he'll feel bad, I'll feel bad, and I'll feel like a snob -'do you like me, because I'm so great' 'What?! You don't?' hee hee. That would be a nightmare.
Egghe-He knows full well I have Ed as my boyfriend. He remembers a lot of things I tell him. He used to have a girlfriend and that was great because I really didn't have to worry. I don't think he would try to make the moves on me. I think I'm 92% safe.
Emmie-Hi! See my comment to Egghe. He knows about Ed, but I don't share too much. I don't like everyone knowing about my private life (except you and YB).
My advice is to be sure to mention your boyfriend around him. Let him know you are very happy with your boyfriend, would never think of leaving him, etc., etc. Sounds like he needs to hear this.
yb, can't you take a hint? peachy just isn't interested! :P muwahahaha....
actually, don't let him stay in your personal space. if he sits down next to you like that again, move over.
he's going to think you don't mind him being there. ya know? and you should let him know you do... even if you don't.
god, did that even make sense???
"Picture this - Sicily, April 1924."
Why did I have to picture Sicily in 1924? Did I miss something? I know they didn't have 7-11's back then! LOL.
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